I relearned a lesson today

Among our ten grandchildren, we have six boys and four girls. To divide our “grandcrew,” another way is to say we have seven completive organized sports athletes and three completive non-organized sports athletes. In the future, there will likely be no professional athletes but ten who enjoy following some sports teams and some type of competitive amateur sports involvement.

But today, I was privileged to take Sutton, 8, to his baseball practice. He has considerable athletic skills. His mind seems to learn quickly to slow down the given sport and adapt to how to play. While he is taller than most boys his age, he does not have the awkwardness. Sutton must be having some growing pains in his legs. Our son had similar issues at the same age. Sutton has been taken to the doctor, who assured him that his discomfort is short-term and manageable.

Today’s practice interrupted his playing with his cousins after school. The ten do have a lot of fun together.

When we got to the practice field, he told me he couldn’t play because his “leg hurt.” We were a little late getting there, so I sent him off, telling him I would wait in the truck. Reluctantly, he headed off. By the time he got to the gate leading to the field, his limp was pronounced in all caps.

Sutton stopped and began talking to one of his coaches. The conversation got lengthy. I got out of the truck and headed toward the coach. The coach turned to me and relayed Sutton’s hesitation. That’s when I took a hard turn in the wrong direction with my advice to resolve the gap between appointment and desire.

Sutton was now in tears, complaining of leg pain. Pops, I, dug in my heels and drew a line in the sand: go to practice or leave the team. I was so confident in my assessment. I was even more wrong. With my accumulation of seventy-eight years of wisdom guiding me, the two of us called his dad to inform him of what was happening as we headed into the dugout to get his ball bag.

After the phone call, one of the other coaches came within distraction distance. Sutton and I relayed our positions to him. The coach calmly assessed the situation and said, “Sutton, why don’t you sit on the bench and watch and learn?” Turning to me, he said, “You can sit with him if you want to.”

I did want to! We sat and watched. Sutton got fidgety. I suggested that he walk back and forth in the dugout, which he did. About that time, another player took Sutton’s normal position on third base. His walk got a little stronger. I encouraged him to go to the coach. He did and asked, “Where do you want me?” “On third base!”

When the ball was headed in his direction, he was “baseball-ready.” His reaction was spot on, as usual. After the play, he went back to limping.

I was back in my truck with my laptop during the practice, starting this confession. As Sutton climbed up on the back bumper of my truck to toss his bag in, I walked over to the first coach I talked to and apologized for my short-sighted, non-compassionate attitude. Then, I walked over to the second coach, apologized, and complimented his wisdom in dealing with the crisis. When Sutton and I were in the truck, I apologized to him.

I also asked him what he had learned. He said, “I need to be sure I focus on accuracy in my throws. (Or something like that.)

I asked the same question but about the tears before the practice. Sutton’s response was, “I need to work through my pain.”

When we caught up with his dad, I apologized again.

In so many areas of my life, I default to the black and white, off or on, in or out, I’m right, you’re wrong, I’m big, you’re little mentality. Compassion, mercy, and grace are all hidden behind a dark curtain of self-righteousness judicial expedience, and Biblical ignorance.

Living the life worthy of Jesus does not just happen; it is intentional in this life. Accumulation of His truth, processing, and adapting to His life never comes naturally. I am not a clear trumpet call to trust and live in the Kingdom of God. Such a witness is supernatural! But I want to be and with practice, I will get closer. ‘

 

“— let a wise person listen and increase learning,
and let a discerning person obtain guidance—“ Proverbs 1:5 ESV